Talk is Cheap

 
 
‘I’m a fighter not a lover’, I used to tell the kisser wannabes.
Getting straight to the point is my philosophy, with as little
talking as possible.
 
That brings me to the story, I’m a better writer than I am
a talker. I examine my inner self just as much as I examine
others, and I have come to realize why and at what moments
I became a better writer than a talker.
 
I am the third child in the line of seven. My two oldest sisters
are very boisterous. They talk a lot and they talk loudly. My mom
is the same. When I was growing up and my dad was there, he
abandoned us when I was 4-years old, my earliest memory of
him was arguments and fights. So really in order to talk and
be noticed took a lot of effort. So I learned to watch for my
moments to shine, turns out they were few and far between.
 
My mom was busy with my baby brother who was two years
younger than me, plus she was always pregnant yet again.
My sisters constantly fought and screamed at each other.
My dad wasn’t ever involved with the family, other than
making it bigger. When things were quiet is when I would
ask for anything, that usually meant when everyone was
in bed and ma’s last duty of the night was to ask me if
I needed anything before she laid down to sleep.
 
While in line for my turn to get attention I now realize that
while waiting, I was observing not just chances, but stories,
stories that I would grow up remembering and sharing.
But not by speaking.
 
Remember that self examination thing? Well, I grew up
with a speech impediment, a lisp, the t’s and s’s are
not always avaible to be used by my tongue. That is
the best explanation I can find. So I was laughed at a lot,
asked over and over, ‘what’, and I was pointed and
smirked at quite a bit. And then in school when I was
seperated from my classmates for speech therapy
it was a spotlight I did not want. All these things made 
me quieter everywhere, except in my head. So my stories
formed there and when I discovered books and that
there were other people out there writing stories,  that
became my outlet.
 
Another first, I became a writer/storyteller at age 6.  
 
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